Don’t Give Up!

LOVE AND RELATIONSHIPS (PART 9): DON’T GIVE UP!

Don’t believe the Hollywood hype, there isn’t just one person right for you, there’s many, and regardless of what type you most closely fit in with, you can’t give up that search for your someone special simply because you haven’t found them yet.

Don’t treat your love life like something supremely special and separate from the other experiences in your life. You’ve probably accomplished a lot, even stuff you may not think is really important or big, but to a lesser person than you, it’s big stuff. But don’t sell yourself short, and don’t sell your experiences short.

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The Relationship Virgin

LOVE AND RELATIONSHIPS (PART 8): THE RELATIONSHIP VIRGIN

Please read Love and Relationships (Part 6): Finding the Right Person to help clarify some of the terms. Remember from Part 6 that the Relationship Virgin is: “a person [who] is so cautious of all the bad relationships they’ve gathered from sources other than themselves, that they have accumulated a list of exactly what they want in a mate and what they don’t want in a mate. They usually create an unobtainable perfect mate in their minds, and are scared away from ever beginning a meaningful relationship with anyone or they think no one is ever good enough to begin a relationship with in the first place…I don’t mean these people are physically virgins, but that they are too cautious with their love lives.”

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The Clueless Lover

LOVE AND RELATIONSHIPS (PART 7): THE CLUELESS LOVER

Please read Love and Relationships (Part 6): Finding the Right Person to help clarify some of the terms. Remember from Part 6 that the Clueless Lover is: “the individual who thinks they are looking for the right person, but truly has no idea who or what they want in a relationship, and simply keep failing at each attempt. We’ll call this individual the Clueless Lover, and I don’t mean these people don’t know what they’re doing in bed, I mean they simply have no clue what it is they want in a relationship.”

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Finding the Right Person

LOVE AND RELATIONSHIPS (PART 6): FINDING THE RIGHT PERSON

This entry, and the ones following, are going to cover what I think many of my single friends misunderstand about romantic relationships. I write this for all the people who say they don’t understand why they can’t find love in their lives. And I write for those who, after having been misled by failed relationships or non-relationships, proclaim they don’t need love or aren’t looking for a relationship in their lives. This isn’t for those who have experienced successful relationships. I believe these individuals should already know what I have to say below (or some version of it), and could probably teach me a thing or two. But if you’re someone about to give up on finding love and developing meaningful relationships, I hope I can persuade you otherwise.

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The Couple’s Accountability System

LOVE AND RELATIONSHIPS (PART 5): THE COUPLE’S ACCOUNTABILITY SYSTEM

How can relationships help us become more independent? Because our relationships with other people and how we deal with them says a lot more about ourselves than just observing how we deal and live with ourselves. And learning more about ourselves and our relationship with others is a key way in understanding how to be independent and even gaging how independent we are.

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Independence vs. Relationships

LOVE AND RELATIONSHIPS (PART 4): INDEPENDENCE VS. RELATIONSHIPS

How can you be independent while being in a relationship? Don’t independent people by definition not need to depend on anyone else? Isn’t being in a relationship having to depend on someone else, therefore completely opposite? There is a lot of confusion among people, especially young people like myself, with how to negotiate our independent lives with our relationship lives. Perhaps you remember the Seinfeld episode outlining the eternal struggle between “Relationship George” and “Independent George” (here’s an excerpt explaining it), where George Costanza struggles to keep the two spheres of his life apart. While the show was abstract in exactly how this struggle might manifest itself, the episode works beautifully to illustrate how important people take their independence, and what efforts they put into maintaining it.

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Communication in Relationships

Love and Relationships (Part 3): Communication in Relationships

If you want the answer to all the questions posed in Part 2, you’re in luck, because there’s one answer to all of them. Communication. Communication doesn’t mean “talking.” Communication means attention, clarity, and allowing for lack of clarity.

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The Phases Leading to a Meaningful Relationship

Love and Relationships (Part 2): The Phases Leading to a Meaningful Relationship

When does a relationship become meaningful, and what does that even mean? That mostly depends on the people involved and what they’re looking for out of the relationship. It’d be useless to discuss any specific activities that occur at any stage in a relationship that might be indicative of it’s progression, and unlike how all of us weened into the world through video games would prefer it, there’s no level summary after you kill the miniboss telling you how efficient your efforts have been or how many secrets you found. In most cases, you’re in the dark constantly, a soldier in the trenches. However, like a soldier, you can look at a map of the terrain, kind of figure out where you might be, and hopefully decide in a direction to take.

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An Introduction to Love and Relationships

Love and Relationships (Part 1): An Introduction

Love can take a lifetime to truly understand. And sometimes a lifetime isn’t even enough. Maybe that’s why so many of us are pretty impatient about our love life, either rushing into or out of relationships that we didn’t give a fair chance for success from the beginning.

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